Other mothers

I don't talk about my family or childhood. I am aware that doing so raises eyebrows and curiousities, and while that is not my intention, I just don't go there. I have several "other mothers" who came into my life here & there and I learned good and bad things from them. My parenting is a mish-mosh of all of these other mothers, with my own insanity blended in.

My first unofficial foster mom stayed in my life longer than any of the official ones (state licensed homes with placement by DCFS aka Gabriel). This mom was a bit quirky, and sadly I have grown apart from the family more and more over the past 5 years or so. This mom was one however, that would have still welcomed the kids & I unannounced on any day, or at any holiday event. She was a mom that never once told me things that hurt me, but instead let me know she thought I was smart, strong, and encouraged my independent spirit. She counted my kids among her grandchildren, and their portraits were proudly displayed among the rest leaving hardly any open space on the shelves and cabinets in her home.

Because of this mom, Michael has memories of big Thanksgiving and Christmas Eve celebrations filled with laughter and cousins. Through the years, as Michael became more aware of the chaos and drama that this family seem to thrive upon, (think Jerry Springer) his recounted memories have been peppered with many stories that start with "Oh my gosh, there was this one time..." and end with "...it was completely insane". This is how the family was, and she wore the matriachal crown with pride.

Thursday evening, she fell. She seemed ok, but fell several more times throughout the early morning hours until she blacked out around 4 am. Her boyfriend took her to the hospital and while they were trying to get an arterial line in, her heart stopped. They were able to revive her, but only to put her on life support. As the biological kids, foster kids (I wasn't the only one), and grown up grandchildren gathered you could feel the love in the room. Once everyone who could get there had arrived, they disconnected the ventilator and it was done.

She was only 64, not a very long life at all. Her husband passed away 6 years ago this September, and I know she has missed him. She had a son who had died within a few days of his birth who would have been about a year older than I am. She has waited my whole lifetime to hold that baby boy. What a great reunion that will be.

I am grateful to Sharon, and all of my other mothers along the way from whom I have learned so much, and continue to learn today. I am also so very grateful for the knowledge that this isn't the end, and that families can be reunited for eternity. I am so excited to start taking the temple prep classes so that Paul & I will be able to be sealed to each other, and Small Paul, and one day Reagan. I am so grateful for the Mathews family, and so proud to be one of them.

Just because you can.

I am at the gym alot these days, actually for the past 6 - 8 months or so. This is not a New Years thing. I like going to the gym for stress relief, and honestly, I really like food. I also like fitting in my jeans, so if I work out, I can eat and still wear my jeans. It would be nice to see them a couple of sizes smaller, but I'm not going to kill myself to get there, I'm just not that determined. It will happen, and in the meantime, someone please pass me the mashed potatoes.

Since I like going to the gym I kind of understand people who run outside. I even ran *jogged & walked* a 5k a few months ago, and it was fun. I understand the excitement of a race where there is a possibility of winning, I am super competitive, just ask Paul!

I have a friend, actually he's the husband of a friend, but he's my facebook friend, which totally counts. He is a darn running rockstar. He has been running a marathon every 5 weeks or so for the past year. He also competed in an ironman competition. He takes his running seriously. A couple of weeks ago he ran in an ultraman 50 mile race, impressive right? The following weekend he threw in another marathon just because he was in the area. He has another marathon coming up, and then another 50 mile race in April. He just announced that he is training for a 100 mile race. Seriously? Rockstar I say! I had to sit down and rest after reading his announcement.

On the one hand I have to admit I'm totally jealous because he could eat an entire lasagna for dinner, followed by a gallon of ice cream without having to worry about his jeans splitting the next day.

On the other hand, I have a car. If I need to get to someplace 100 miles away, or 50 miles away, or really even 26.2 miles away I will drive there. If my car breaks down someplace remote, I have a cell phone to call for help from, and I don't think there are any gaps in Verizon's coverage areas that are 100 miles wide. This is not a skill I need to master - thank goodness!

Furthermore, if some wild animal or invading space alien is going to chase me on foot for 100 miles I say it has earned a Laura sandwich for lunch.

Does moderation in all things include things like running? I've always thought of it as more of a rule about cheesecake, but now I'm wondering... I will go ahead and assume that for me, it does. I will exercise at the gym for a reasonable amount of time, and I will exercise a reasonable amount of self control (most of the time) when I am placing an order into a drive thru speaker. Diet Coke is not included in anything related to moderation. Diet Coke is my friend :)

Happy Birthday Shawn E Boy and New Years Resolutions

Happy Birthday Shawn!!! Shawn is officially 8, which of course means big, BIG things! #1 - Baptism... We are shooting for the first Saturday in March, so we want everyone who is in town to come on over & "set a spell" with us! It will no doubt be fun and food filled! #2 - Scouts! Even though he is a little bit nervous, there is no question that Shawn will absolutely love scouts once he gets going. He is all boy, and will love doing boy things... he gets stuck here with all of us girls who just don't get it sometimes :). Small Paul just isn't quite up to speed on these things yet!


As a new year is upon us, I am trying to look ahead, rather than behind, and think about some goals I'd like to see us accomplish as a family. I take on this responsibility because otherwise our family goals would include things like "play more Wii, chat with online friends we just saw at school, or book more gigs"
Last year our big goal was to never miss a FHE, and I am so proud to say that we made it!!!! I was less proud when Reagan asked me this morning why we stopped having them - she thought it had been for-ever. No Reagan, we've just had some Family away from home evenings... the Temple, a movie night, Sea World etc... these things still count right? Geesshk - I'd like to see her come up with 52 lessons & treats & battle plans for getting through a traditional FHE in this house!

This year goals :

#1 is for Paul & I to go to the Temple, and to start the process to be sealed. We have to have permission from the First Presidency for it to happen, but I'm feeling confident!

#2 is to continue our winning streak with FHE, and to also make sure we have family prayer EVERY day. This one should be easy, and we are probably making it happen about 60% of the time, but I want to try for 100% this year. I know it strengthens us as a family and provides a solid footing for the kids as they grow into adulthood.

#3 is to make healthier food choices and exercise more! I have got to get the kids to eat better - any tips? They are quite the stubborn bunch, and out of fear that they will famish someone (who shall remain nameless) will disregard my "this is what we are having so you need to eat at least some of it" statement and drive to 4 different fast food places. I think our next FHE may involve a viewing of SuperSize me.

#4 is to learn to use my new, exciting, full of many tricks camera! My one trick is demonstrated above (poorly but whatever). See how the background is all blurry? I meant to do that - no really - not like when I change our dinner to "cajun style" because I'm on facebook.

In an effort to keep #4 I will end this quickly - cajun style lasagna isnt fun for anyone!

#4

Baking madness... and Small Paul cuteness

Last week was our official cookie tray handout for family home evening. In total, I baked 896 cookies, plus 5 different types of candies for about 36 trays we handed out to families, teachers, and other assorted friends. It was a lot of fun! I love baking sooo much, it is probably my favorite thing to do, other than hanging out with the kids! The best part of the crazy number of cookies is that by the time they are done I have no desire to eat ANY of them - the thought is just overwhelming. If you received a Mathews cookie tray, we sure hope you liked them! If not, you will still probably get your hands on something I have baked this Christmas season - I normally have something loaded with sugar in hand wherever I go... I hope everyone knows how much I appreciate having them in our lives, and my feeding you is just my way of showing it!


Small Paul is 15 months old already - seriously, how can that be? He is a super genius with an ever expanding vocabulary... He now says:
Bird
Arf
Out
Up
Dad
Mama
Ana (Savannah)
Fish
That
Boob (thanks Paul)
And most importantly, bap (any Christmas decorations, especially lights)

However.... HE WONT WALK! What gives? He can stand, will furniture walk, and is a master of going up and down the stairs. He can also escape from any grocery cart seat belt faster than I can grab a can of corn off of the shelf, but no walking... I know that part of this is because he has a harem at the ready knocking each other down to get a chance to hold him, but really? 15 months? Michael was running at 9 months, and I was worried when Reagan didn't start until 11 months. Is this a Mathews thing? Is this a baby with lots of older siblings thing? I keep reminding myself that life is easier when they aren't walking, but I'm getting a little worried!

It's December, and duct tape cant fix everything...

Still no pics, why? Well, my camera is literally held together with duct tape, which is really silly because it still doesn't work 99% of the time. Why bother with the duct tape you might ask, but I am still holding out hope that it will magically repair the camera, if I just believe hard enough...

Christmas is pratically here!!!! Can you feel the excitement in the air? OMGoodness I am just flat out giddy with anticipation! This weekend is the Creche festival in a nearby ward bldg., and it is always very cool. Last year there were over 700 nativities from around he world - I just love seeing them all. They have everything from the most simple to totally ornate, toy ones, hand carved ones, itty bity inside a walnut shell ones, and giant living people on the stage ones.
The rest of the lights at the temple go up this weekend, so that will be our FHE for next week - totally excited about that too!

I think that the LA area is going to be invaded by a gagillion (slight exageration) Mathews family members soon too, which is very exciting for all of us! Man, I sure do love me some Mathews cousins/aunts/uncles etc...

To quote Shawn, "I'm so excited my head is going to explode!"

Best evers...

No photos this time, I just want to say how grateful I am for my wonderful, fun, and very blessed life! I am finding that I am having more and more days, moments, and events that I've walked away from thinking "that was the best_________ever". This year has been great, and I am so grateful that I have such a fantastic, loving, caring, supportive husband, along with such wonderful kids to share my life with! I can't imagine how things could be better. Our house is crazy, and loud, and I love it! Our kids do silly, random things, and will stand their ground going toe to toe with whomever, including me, and I love that... My girls are stubborn, but as they mature, that will be what makes them strong women, and no one will take advantage of them. My boys are strong, determined, and see the world through their creative, imagination filled eyes, and they are sensitive enough to become great dads and husbands, just like Paul. Life is good, even if no one but me eats all of their veggies, or picks up their dirty socks.

The Big "1"

This face...



I SO LOVE this face!! Every day for a year now we have had this beautiful face, and this beautiful person here making our lives more complete. Small Paul is the happiest baby I have ever known... he has a smile for everyone, and laughs at everything the bigger kids do. One day we were at the doctor's ofc., waiting to check in, when an older woman came over & was staring at him - I was distracted by trying not to lose Shelby, Reagan or Shawn when I noticed her. She had tears in her eyes and told me that he was so beautiful, and that he had just made her day so much better. Just a week or so ago another woman was looking at him while I was waiting for copies at Staples. She told me "you know, I've never had children of my own so maybe I appreciate them more, but your baby is overwhelmingly beautiful..."

I have to agree with them.

A couple of weeks ago, my friend & photographer, Chrissi Richards, got the brilliant idea to have Small Paul, her daughter Julia, and our tortoise, Dorothy, race... Dorothy won - Small Paul kept heading the wrong direction!